- by Sirpa Bister (Dreamer)
Here is the begin of "The Letter"
The heartbreaking decision!
Dagmar stand by the window in her room looking out to the
darkness. Her eyes was soared of crying and she still had some tears falling
down on her cheeks. She couldn't see a thing and she realised in that moment
that she didn't either hear any noise in the house. The moment had arrived!
.....
She turn around and took the letter in her hand for to check
it once more, it was and put it in the envelope leaning against her photo over
the drawing-table, "There they would see it!"
Her eyes laid down on her voyage-bag, the smaller one and she
even manage to smile while thinking that her whole life, 17 years was inside
that bag. She didn't needed much, just the most important things, some clothes,
personal belongings and a few photos and her saved money, that was all.
She took her coat and put it on and was about to take the bag
over her bed when she hesitated. She sat down beside her bag and felt in her
thoughts.
The quarrel!
Her father was one of the richest men in the county, building
up his political career and with his well growing business of Jeweller's, same
as the family, one of the most respectable and oldest families around. As long
as she knew the men in the family had always been goldsmidth's and got richer and
richer generation by generation.
Dagmar sighed and realise that she was leaving all this behind
as her dad told he would disinherit her, and banish her from this family if she
wouldn't do as told. She had the last evenings quarrel fresh in her memory when
dad had informed her that, after one week they would have a festive dinner for
the engagement of her and Alexandre, a man she hated. Her dad had planned this
since she was a little girl.
For the first time in her life, Dagmar raised up filled with
anger and she told dad "NO!" First time she dare to say something
against him. She had revealed her secret in the anger, told she would never
marry that man as she was in love with another one, and would do anything for to
be together with her beloved for the rest of her life. She had even made the
mistake of revealing his name.
The reaction was immediate! "A foreigner and poor, that's
out of question! Not in our family, what would it do to our reputation and to
our good name? And to your mother?" Dagmar had got silent and she was
scared not knowing what to do or say next. Her dad was standing tall right in
front of her and had told "If she was going to keep on with this foolish
idea of her, and if she wouldn't do as told, she could leave the mansion and
forget the family, her mother, brother, him and any heritance! She would
be totally banned! Then he directed her to go to her room reflecting over her
behaviour and that they would discuss this matter in the morning for to see if
she had forgot those crazy ideas.
Dagmar walked away from the room hearing her
mothers silent cry, but she didn't dare to lift up her head for to take a last
look at her, for she knew now what she had to do!
When her dad close the library door after her she could hear
them discussing with a low voice. She started to run quietly and went in to her
friends and personal servant's room. The girl was sewing behind her table.
Dagmar explained the situation with a trembling voice and the girl, Jelena got
up putting her cloak over her shaking shoulders, running out from the room and
the house. "She had a mission, a very important one," she knew,
"Dagmar needed her and she wouldn't let her down." Jelena was the only
one who knew about everything that had happened and she stood behind Dagmar's
choice even if it was the last time she would see her very best friend she ever
had, actually she was the only friend after that her mother had died in a
terrifying illness.
Dagmar went to her own room but she was too nervous to even
sit down, she walked front and back in the room like a panther in a cage, she
just couldn't calm down. The wind was howling outside and a branch from the tree
outside was striking on the window making her even more nervous.
Finally she hear the expected knocking on her door, and Jelena came in with
an exited look at her face, without a word she gave Dagmar a letter which she
read carefully and silent. Reaching to the end of it she lift her face and look
at Jelena still with the silence hanging over the room, but then breaking it
telling Jelena to help her pack quickly. They did it with tense movements and
both trembling, fighting the tears to go back but it was impossible. When they
put the last things in the bag they both cried and felt the sorrow deep in their
hearts. They sat embraced over the bed just crying.
But then Dagmar got up at
her feet as Jelena too and they gave their last embrace enclosing all the
friendship and sisterly love they had shared for each others since they had been
babies. Dagmar look at Jelena, still silent and just moving her lips a little whispering; "Thank you Jelena, I will never forget you!"
"Neither would I," Jelena replied very quietly with the most saddest
look in her still tearing red eyes. "Jelena! Go now and don't look back, go to
sleep and when you see the morning sunshine and hear the birds singing at
the top of the trees, think of me and that I am happy then, together with my
first and
only man I love so deeply. Don't be sad, I will think of you when the sun sets
down and the darkness will sweep the forest inside it's embrace, I will remember
our happy life together and will never let this friendship die in my heart, you
have been as a sister to me, my best friend, my confidante, and all my secrets has
been your secrets too. Now for the last time I will ask you to keep this secret
until noon, and if my letter hasn't been found by then, please tell my
mother but carefully!"
"You know you can trust me and yes I will. I know you will be happy, gosh how romantic this really is, I wish I could find a love
for me as you did, well maybe there is someone for me out in this wide world,
somewhere, just waiting for to be found by me."
Jelena said smiling.
"Be sure you will, you are the most sweetest and beautiful
girl I ever known, with your heart so warm sharing love for everyone and
everywhere, kindness to
envy, yes for sure you will find someone. Who wouldn't love you once they get to
know you hon?"
Dagmar had to write the letter still, she remembered suddenly,
and now they had to say their final goodbyes, hugging each-others feeling the
wet cheeks of so much crying, the pain of knowing it would be the last time. It
hurted a lot.
Finally Dagmar let Jelena go. She could hear Jelenas cry away
at the hallway, it frightened her a little, she hope that no one heard it but
herself. When she close the door she sat down by her table, took a paper and her pen and become absorbed by
her writing. Once finished, she rice up and put the letter and pen over the
table carefully with tender. It has been her table throughout all the years, the
paper and even the pen had her monogram in them. It had been a gift from her
parents last Christmas, the whole writing-set. Dagmar shaked her head as to
shake away the memories and leave them behind forever. She would have a new
life, a new begin with the love of her life, her first, last and unique love.
She changed her clothes quickly, maybe too quickly she
realised, there were still too much time as she had to wait for total silence in
the mansion to sneak out secretly to the meeting with her beloved. This would be
the begin of a new path, a new world and a new being of her. This was her
destiny. The faith would leave her to be beside him until the eternity, forever
together. No one could stop them now!
Dagmar walked by the window and looked out trying to see
throught the darkness but it was quite impossible, she
could only see what was nearby as the light outside had been turned off by the
servant, making his usual round in their
big garden. "Their garden!" This was propably the last time she would let
her think about this issue, the fact she was leaving all behind, meant it, she
wouldn't give in for any memories, it would be too painfull. She tried to stir out for to see better, wondering if Mikko was
there waiting for her already, but she could not see a thing, just the top of the
trees what was waving with the strength of the wind. "It was quite
windy", she thought "hope it will not rain this night, not tonight so
they could get much longer in their run before the dawn. They had too if they
wanted to be together without to be caught!"
....
Leaving!
The candle was flickering and had nearly burned up when she
jumped up suddenly, the coco-clock was hitting twice already! "I have
to leave!" She took her bag and placed her hat over her curly silvery blond
hair taking a last look in the mirror before sweeping out the light. Her deep
blue eyes was red and swollen of crying and her cheeks blushed of
excitement, for the rest she looked alright. At her door she turned around
for the one and last time, let her look wander in the room, memorizing it into
the last detail. Her whole body was shaking of fear and exitement that somebody will come and
surprise her, silently she close the door and walk down the stairs with tears running on
her cheeks. She open up the mansions heavy door also for her last time. This time
she didn't turn around, she just step down the stairs and was out in the plain
ground, there she stand still for a moment letting the heavy wind fill her lungs
with the gentle odour of the house and roses in the surrounding garden, for her to
memorize and keep it safe in the deepest of her heart for the rest of her life.
Then she started first to walk then to run with light steps into the darkness to
the woods and in the arms of her beloved.
Martti
Copyright © 2003-2004 Sirpa Bister
Close this window when
you've read and continue The Letter with the next part!
